Holly
Ladies -- my life would have been way easier had I known the principles in this book earlier and how to act on them, and I want to help save you from going through the heartache I've had.
We are familiar with what it means to go "all the way" physically before marriage. But what about going "all the way" emotionally -- where our hearts get unhealthily invested in either a person or the idea of marriage before it's time? Is that harmful too? I would submit a definite "yes" to that question.
This book puts on paper what my conscience told me but I could never articulate. It addresses the hairy issue that many women struggle with that is the equivalent to guys' visual lust struggles... you know, the fantasy world of daydreaming of a future life together with so-and-so, obsessing, wondering if so-and-so is "the one", etc. that robs us of the freedom and joy of TODAY! :)
But it's hardly addressed and is overlooked in Christian circles today as something that isn't a big deal. In reality it is something that can tear apart our relationship with Christ as well as a future marriage if it is not dealt with. It's not a guy issue but a heart issue.
The author of this book vulnerably shares ways that this is harmful as well as ways that we can work to prevent and fight it. I think there are some really good principles in here that may not be so popular, but I think they are great because it brings our focus back to Christ, which is where our hearts are most free -- whether we are married or single. :) I think His dreams far surpass our dreams for ourselves and He longs to provide His dreams for us because He loves us. His dreams and plans for us are far more free, more abundant, and more joyful. :)
It's called Emotional Purity by Heather Paulsen. If you order it from the publisher, Crossway, you get a free PDF copy right away. Here's the link: http://www.gnpcb.org/product/158134855X
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Emotional Purity: An Affair of the Heart
Have you ever given your heart to someone who didn’t love you back?
Do you feel like you’ve experienced heartache over and over again?
If you are emotionally attached to someone, it’s easy to cross the line and become emotionally intimate. Then if the relationship doesn’t work out, you’re left with scars on your heart.
The church teaches us the importance of physical purity; but it teaches little about emotional purity. Christian singles often wear their hearts on their sleeves, which can lead to intense, emotionally intimate, male-female “friendships” with no commitment to pursuing marriage. People may have had several of these “friendships” and still consider themselves pure, but in reality they have given away pieces of their hearts that should be reserved for their future spouses.
Emotional Purity will show you how to define and set boundaries in your relationships to avoid making the same mistakes. Learn how to guard your heart and keep it emotionally pure.
Using fictional and real-life examples along with sound biblical advice, author Heather Arnel Paulsen outlines the pitfalls of undefined relationships and presents guidelines for living an emotionally pure life.
This book will also help a married person who may be tempted to cross the lines into an emotional affair with a "friend". Married Christians will learn how to maintain emotional faithfulness within the marriage vows. Although, the book is written with singles in mind, may married people find great benefit in reading.
Do you feel like you’ve experienced heartache over and over again?
If you are emotionally attached to someone, it’s easy to cross the line and become emotionally intimate. Then if the relationship doesn’t work out, you’re left with scars on your heart.
The church teaches us the importance of physical purity; but it teaches little about emotional purity. Christian singles often wear their hearts on their sleeves, which can lead to intense, emotionally intimate, male-female “friendships” with no commitment to pursuing marriage. People may have had several of these “friendships” and still consider themselves pure, but in reality they have given away pieces of their hearts that should be reserved for their future spouses.
Emotional Purity will show you how to define and set boundaries in your relationships to avoid making the same mistakes. Learn how to guard your heart and keep it emotionally pure.
Using fictional and real-life examples along with sound biblical advice, author Heather Arnel Paulsen outlines the pitfalls of undefined relationships and presents guidelines for living an emotionally pure life.
This book will also help a married person who may be tempted to cross the lines into an emotional affair with a "friend". Married Christians will learn how to maintain emotional faithfulness within the marriage vows. Although, the book is written with singles in mind, may married people find great benefit in reading.
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