Kate O'Mara

Reviewed By: Kate O'Mara (Orignally posted on: Eclectic Homeschool Online)

emotional PURITY: An Affair of the Heart provides wisdom and a pathway for adolescents to follow through the "dating" years. It's hard for a parent to explain to teenagers and young adults that the world has a very different view of dating. It may seem that everyone is dating and they will be left out if they don't date. But that really isn't the case. The truth is that most young people that date carry emotional baggage with them into their marriages that they need not have carried had they only waited for the right person to come along.

Author Heather Paulsen walks the adolescent through the process of remaining emotionally pure until that person, that special person that God has picked for them comes, into their life. In the examples given in the book (and echoed throughout Christian churches) couples who wait for the person God wants them to marry have strong and happy marriages.

Chapter 1, called "Tracy and Mike," recounts a not-uncommon situation. Tracy and Mike are "just friends." They are good company for each other. However, one of them becomes emotionally hopeful or involved or invested in the relationship, while the other doesn't. Broken hearts can result from this worldview of men and women being "just friends."

"Avoiding Early Intimacy" and "Finding Good Guidance" are helpful chapters, as the ways to avoid such intimate scenarios become increasingly important to young people.

"Guarding Your Heart" is a chapter that every young woman should read. "God created women with hearts that are more sensitive and emotional than men's." Who doesn't know this? Some young women try to say they don't have tender hearts, but down deep inside they know that they do. The tender heart of a woman is needed to bond with her husband completely. It is not a good thing to bond in fleeting relationships.

The "Defining Friendship" chapter explains how many folks use the words "just friends" to mean no obligation. But what is a friendship without obligation, without loyalty?? The differences in definitions are staggering and can have intense impact on the young or na Chapter 8, "Trusting in God," shares thoughts, ideas, and Scripture about the fear that many single people have about being single forever. Settling for the wrong mate is not what God wants for you. You must trust God's plan. Preparing for marriage is a big task. To truly know that you are ready for a life-long commitment and understand that God will bring that right person into your life is a very mature concept to grasp.

The chapter called "Dating Done Differently" describes a balanced and Godly approach to dating. Dating with accountability, blessing, and allowing God to be in control (rather than emotions or physical passion) is a beautiful way to find a mate. If you can date with mutual respect and pray on the things that are troubling, you will find that right mate to marry.

Other chapters include: Learning True Contentment, Creating Sage ideals, Watching Your Feelings, Understanding Your Expectations, Following God's Plan, Seeing Christ's Design, and Enjoying Your Single Years. All are full of Scripture references that relate exactly to the issue at hand.

For those who love a happy ending, and I am one, "Continuing My Journey" tells the author's story of her wait before God put she and her husband in the same place at the same time. Their story brings a smile as you find that everyone around them thought they should be together, even before they met.

"Questions for Study and Discussion" lets this volume be used as a personal reference or inner writing guide, or as a group guide for young adults. emotional PURITY is a must read for young, single Christians as well as parents who wish to guide their youth through adolescence.